The Things Marik Says and Do's
by sherein22
Summary: Just stuff Marik do and say. Rated for abridgyness.
1. Chapter 1

One: The Microwave

Marik: I command you to heat up my food. (Stares at microwave)

Microwave:...

Marik: Heat up my food!

microwave:...

Marik: Ahhhhhhhh! I will show you to ignore me! (sends microwave to the shadow realm)

Ishizu: Marik I'm ho... Where's the microwave?!

Marik: It wouldn't listen to me so it's in the shadow realm.

Ishizu: (facepalms) You have to press the buttons on the microwave to heat up your food Marik.

Marik: It still wouldn't listen to me though.

Ishizu: (walks out of the room)

Marik: Hey! the microwave still has my food! Curse you microwave!

Marik: (brings back the microwave) Ok _microwave_ I will give you one last chance, heat up my food. (starts pressing the buttons)

Marik: Yes I conquered you, you are now my slave, Steve number 587. Now Steve give me my food.

Steve 587:...

Marik: How dare you! (sends Steve to shadow realm)


	2. Chapter 2

Two: The Pianist

Marik: Bakura!

Bakura: What now Marik?

Marik: What is this contraption?

Bakura: It's called the piano.

Marik: Pi an o?

Bakura: Yes.

Marik: I will now learn to play the piano!

Bakura: You mean a pianist.

Marik: Yes I will be the best penis.

Bakura: (tries to contain his laughter) P-penis?

Marik: Yes I will be the most famous penis in the world.

Bakura: (Laughs loudly)

Marik: What's so funny Fluffy?

Bakura: N-nothing M-marik. (laughs)

Marik: Fine don't tell me, I will just become a penis.

Bakura: (Laughs) Do that.

Marik: You don't believe me, I will show you. (walks away)


	3. Chapter 3

Three: Marik and the TV

Marik: Ishizu I'm Bored.

Ishizu: I should care why?

Marik: Entertain me.

Ishizu: No Marik, just watch TV.

Marik: Ok. (walks to TV)

Marik: (stares at blank screen) Entertain me!

TV:...

Marik: Stupid technology (grabs TV remote and throws it at TV)

TV: Today the weather will be like...

Marik: I did it yes! Now how do I change the channel? (looks at remote)

Marik: Stop staring at me tiny slave!

Melvin: Just pick up your _slave_ and try pressing the buttons. (1)

Marik: What will happen if I do Mel?

Melvin: (Shrugged shoulders) I don't know, well I'm going to Florence's to kidnapped his hikari, bye Marik.

Marik:... Bye...Wait!

Melvin: What!?

Marik: Bye me a drink.

Melvin: OK. (leaves)

Marik: (Picks up remote) Ok slave prepare to be conquered

~Two Hours Later~

Marik: Gah! Stupid remote, I will poke you to death! (presses a button)

TV: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea... (2)

Marik:...It's the Sponge show! (jumps behind the couch)

Marik: This is your fault. (throws TV at remote)

TV:... SpongeBob Square Pants...

Marik: Ahhhhhhhhhhh! It's pure torture, how can anyone watch this!?

~At Seto's House~

Mokuba: Seto! SpongeBob is on.

Seto: Shut Up Mokuba!

~Back at Marik's~

Marik: Help, someone, the square slave is torturing me! (Runs into kitchen)

Ishizu: What now Marik?

Marik: The screen is evil, it's torturing me.

Ishizu: (face palms walks in living room, picks up the remote and turns it off) There, happy now.

Marik: O-o How did you do that!? You must teach me.

Ishizu: I just pressed the buttons on the remote.

Marik: Oh.

Melvin: (walks in with a tied up Ryou and a drink) I'm back.

Ryou: Help me please!

Melvin: Here's your drink. (gives drink to Marik then leaves with Ryou)

Marik: (takes a sip) Hey! It's diet. He's truly evil.

_(1) Melvin has his own body._

_(2) SpongeBob, sorry if you like SpongeBob, but I couldn't think of a better show._

_Also Ryou got some screen time._

_Ryou: But I was kidnapped._

_Any way, this had some Deathshipping in it, if you guys were wondering._

_Well see you next time, Reviews would be very nice, and if I get enough I will add in theifshipping in the next chapter. Ok :) BYE PEEPS!_


	4. Author's Note

**_Authors Note ~IMPORTANT~_**

_I didn't get any reviews, and I would like some. So when I get at least 5 reviews I will continue this story. If not, then you are all meanies. So BYE PEEPS!_


	5. Chapter 5: Part 1

_I Can't believe I got five reviews in one day, thanks, people now this story continues._

Five: Guns plus Marik equals...Uh, you'll find out. Part 1

Marik: Bakura what is this thing?

Bakura: It's called a gun.

Marik: A gun? What do I do with a gun?

Bakura: You shoot stuff.

Marik: That's so cool!

Bakura: Now all you have to do is aim and... (Shoots gun)

Random Person: Ahhh! My arm!

Marik: Ok, so like this? (points gun at Bakura)

Bakura: Uh Marik, point it the other way.

Marik: Oh so... (shoots gun)

Bakura: Ahhh! (falls to the ground)

Marik: Fluffy! (go's next to Bakura)

Marik: Fluffy don't die I love you!

Bakura: What did you say?

Marik: Uh...(hits Bakura on the head)

Marik: You heard nothing Kura. (Get's up and walks away)

Yami: The robber is unconscious? Good. (kneels next to Bakura and grabs his ring)

Yami: I'll see you later Kura. (Smirks and walks away)

~1 hour later~

Bakura: ( bust's in Marik's house) Marik! Where's my ring?!

Marik: What ring? You were wearing a ring?

Bakura: (face palms) I mean my millennium ring idiot.

Marik: Oh. (Thinks)

~30 min. later~

Marik: Uh nope

Bakura Phone rings

Bakura: What!?

Yami: Hello Bakura.

Bakura: What is it pharaoh?

Yami: I have your ring. (hangs up)

Bakura:...Pharaoh! (Runs out of Mariks house)

Marik: Fine ignore me! (grabs gun)

Marik: I'll have fun without you. (walks out)

Marik: Ok target sighted, I think. (pulls trigger)

Police Officer: Ahhh! (Falls down)

Marik: Shit! (runs away)

Police Officer 2: Hey! (chases Marik)

~Later~

Marik: You can't do this I'm Marik Sebastion Ishtar the 3rd, I command you to let me go!

_To be continued...Reviews please BYE PEEPS!_


	6. Chapter 5: Part 2

Five: Guns plus Marik equals...Uh, you'll find out. Part 2

Marik: Ahh help I'm innocent you here!

Police Officer: Yeah then why do you have a gun?

Marik: I don't have a gun. (throws gun)

Police Officer: Yeah you have to come with me.

Marik: What's your name?

Police Officer: Steve why?

Marik: (takes out rod) Release me slave!

Officer Steve: Yes master. (leaves)

Marik: Yes i'm free! (runs away)

**~Tristan's words of wisdom~**

**Tristan: Never talk to mean oranges.**

**~This has been Tristan's words of wisdom~ (1)**

_Hey guys thanks for the reviews and now is the end of the 2 part story_

_(1) I thought this would be fun to include for now on, so tell me what you think._

_Please more reviews and see you next time. BYE PEEPS! _


	7. Chapter 6

Six: Marik has a vacuum

Marik: Ishizu! How do I vacuum?

Ishizu: You move across the rug.

Marik: Ok (moves vacuum around)

Marik: Nothing is working!

Ishizu: You plug it in and flip the switch!

Marik: Ok! (pugs vacuum in and turns it on)

Marik: This is loud!

Bakura: What did you... (Stares at vacuum)

Marik: Hey Fluffy, can you tell me how to vacuum? (moves towards Bakura with vacuum)

Bakura: Ahhh the evil sucker! (Hisses and jumps on the fan)

Marik: What?! What did you say?!

Bakura: Get away from me!

Marik: How do I turn it off?!

Bakura: Must. hide. from. vacuum.

Marik: Ahh I can't turn it off! Fluffy Help me!

Bakura: I'm not getting near that thing!

Marik: Come on Fluffy please?

Bakura: (Hisses and slaps the vacuum)

Marik: And you tell me your not a cat.

Bakura: Shut the bloody up Marik!

(Vacuum moves forward)

Bakura: Ahhh! It's alive (jumps on Marik)

Marik: Ahh! (falls down)

**Technical difficulties**

**~Here's the words of wisdom by Tristan~**

**Tristan: I'm an octopus.**

**~This has been the words of wisdom by Tristan~**

**Now back to Marik and Bakura**

Marik: Ahh! Get off me Fluffy!

Bakura: Turn that thing off!

Melvin: (Walks in) Well well well, this is interesting.

Marik and Bakura: Help me!

Melvin: (grabs the vacuum and turns it off) There happy now?

Marik: Yes thank you, now get off of me Fluffy!

Bakura: Fine. (Gets off of Marik)

_Yugi: Hello. :) Now that's finish I would like to say that I am going to be in the next one!_

_Me: Yeah yeah, now back to business I would like some reviews to let me know what you think._

_Yugi: Please give her reviews, I'll be in the next one if you do, so Please. (Puppy dog eyes)_

_Me: Yeah now see you next time. BYE PEEPS!_


	8. Chapter 7

Seven: When life gives you cards play a children's card game

Yugi: I challenge you to a duel Marik!

Marik: I will use my Mega Ultra... Ahh! you have it.

Yugi: I will use my super special awesome card to destroy you.

Marik: Which card is that?

Yugi:...I will destroy you.

Marik: Your on B*tch!

Yugi: Loser has to listen to Tea's 5 hour speech about friendship.

Marik: Your on!

**While this duel is going on...**

**~Here are Tristan's words of wisdom~**

**Tristan: Now I'm an Orange.**

**~This has been Tristan's words of wisdom~**

**After the duel**

Yugi: Ha ha ha, you lose Marik.

Marik: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Yugi: Hey Tea.

Tea: Yes Yugi?

Yugi: Marik wants to hear your 5 hour speech about friendship (Smiles evily)

Tea: Ok, come on Marik lets go. (Grabs Marik's collar and drags him away)

Marik: HELP ME PLEASE!

Mokuba: Tea is going to torture Marik Seto.

Seto: I'll allow it.

**~5 hours later~**

Marik:...(twitches)

Tea: And that is the meaning of friendship.

Marik:...help me... (falls to the floor)

Tea: So did you listen Marik?

Marik:... That was worse then when my father gave me a tattoo.

Tea: I can tell you it again.

Marik: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (runs away)

Tea: (pouts and looks at a kid) Hey kid do you want to know the meaning of friendship?

Kid: Ok. (1)

**~Back to Marik~**

Marik: I want my mommy. (curls up in a ball)

Melvin: Do you want a hug?

Marik: Never mind i'm fine now. (runs into his room)

Melvin: How Rude. (walks in the kitchen)

_(1) The kid died after hearing Tea's speech_

_Me: That was chapter 7 see you next time._

_Ryou: Hey I want some more screen time._

_Me: Fine you can be one of the main characters in chapter 8..._

_Ryou: Yes!_

_Me: If I get 5 more reviews._

_Ryou: Buggar. Please give her 5 reviews, this means so much to me. Please (Gives the biggest puppy dog eyes with a pout)_

_Me: Awww. (shakes head) Any way Reviews would be awesome, and if you want to see more of Ryou just give me 5 more reviews. P.S In Chapter 8, There's going to be cuteness. BYE PEEPS!_


	9. Chapter 8

Eight: The Cutest Stuff the Yugioh Characters Do

_Hi this is chapter 8, hope you like it. Sorry if it's short._

1. Ryou and Bakura sleep together.

Bakura: *has his arms around Ryou*

Ryou: *is laying his head on his chest*

Bakura and Ryou: *sleeping*

2. Marik wearing a kitten costume

Marik: This isn't funny guys!

Mariku: *laughing* Yes it is.

Marik: *glares* No it's not.

Mariku: *holds a ball of yarn* Come on Marik go get it. *throws the yarn*

Marik: Yarn! *jumps after it and plays with it*

3. Yugi eating cake

Yugi: This is great! *eats the cake*

Yami: Um slow down Yugi.

Yugi: *smiles and has cake all over his face*

Yami: *starts laughing*

Yugi: What?

**~Tristan's words of Wisdom~**

**Tristan: This is my favorite show *stares at a blank TV screen***

**~This has been Tristan's Words of Wisdom~**

4. Ryou in a bunny costume, asleep

Ryou: *sleeping*

Bakura: cute.

Marik: did you just call Ryou cute?

Bakura: *blushes* N-no. Leave now Marik.

_Hey guys this has been chapter 8, sorry if it's short. Well Bye Peeps! _

_Oh and please give me reviews and ideas are nice._


	10. Chapter 9

Nine: Marik at... Oh no, the zoo.

Marik: Wow. Look at all the balloons!

Bakura: *face palms* Were here to see animals, not get balloons idiot.

Marik: Fine.

Ryou: What should we see first?

Mariku: The alligator.

Marik: No. I want to see the lions.

Bakura: Then go.

Marik and Mariku: Alright *leaves*

~With Marik~

Marik: *walking around, but stops when he saw the monkeys* Ooooo. *see's the keys and grabs them* You must be sad, here. *gives the keys and leaves*

Monkey: *opens the cage and escapes*

Random person: Help the monkeys are loose! *runs around in a circle*

kid: The Monkeys are coming, the monkeys are coming!

Monkey: *opens the other cages*

Marik: *Comes back* O-o Oops. *shrugs his shoulders* ah well. *walks away*

**~Now Tristan's words of Wisdom~**

**Tristan: That's shiny. *stares at keys***

**~This has been Tristan's words of wisdom~**

Bakura: Great. Come on Ryou we have to leave. *grabs Ryou's hand and walks away*

Mariku: *laughing at the people running in fear*

Marik: *running after a monkey that stole his rod* Come back here!

Lion: *roars and jumps at Mariku*

Mariku: Ahhh! *starts running*

Bakura: If they call us, don't look back.

Ryou: Ok. *holds on to Bakura*

Bakura: *sighs and continues walking*

Marik: *finally got his rod back* Yes, my precious.

Mariku: *ran out of the Zoo*

Marik: *walks out of the zoo talking to his rod*

_Hey guys, hope you liked it. Reviews would be nice please. Bye Peeps!_


	11. Chapter 10

Ten: Marik finds out Unicorns aren't real

Marik: *holding a stuff unicorn* Mr. Stuffy what should we do today?

Marik talking as Mr. Stuffy: Watch The Unicorn Show(1).

Marik: Ok. *starts watching The Unicorn Show*

Melvin(2): *comes in Mariks room* Really you're watching the demon horse show.

Marik: I'm watching the Unicorn show with real unicorns Melvin.

Melvin: Unicorns aren't real Marik.

Marik: Yes they are the TV never lies.

Melvin: The show said in the beginning that Unicorns aren't real.

Marik: WHAT!

**~Now Tristan's Words of Wisdom~**

**Tristan: Unicorns aren't real? *starts crying* NOOO!**

**~This has been Tristan's Words of Wisdom~**


	12. Chapter 11

Eleven: Marik playing Slenderman

Marik: I'm walking in the woods, Oh my allergies are acting up. ACHOO!

Marik: Slenderman, Slenderman he's the man that kills us all.

Marik: Ug these leaves i'm stepping on remind me when my cat uses the litter box.

Bakura: You don't have a cat Marik.

Marik: Shut up, your my cat.

Bakura: I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.

Marik: Ooooo a house in the middle of nowhere. *walks in the house with his avatar*

~LETTER~

Thanks for coming, now please get the 8 other letters in the woods, before Slenderman gets you.

~END LETTER~

Marik: I'm walking in the woods today hoping for a big surprise, if I go in the woods today I will surely die.

Slenderman: Hi guys

Bakura and Marik: Ahh!

Slenderman: I'm just going to tell you your going to die.

Bakura: Get out of here you (BEEP)(1)!

**~Now Tristan's Words of Wisdom~**

**Tristan: Serenity is hot**

**~This has been Tristan's words of wisdom~**

Slenderman: Bye Guys *leaves*

Marik: That guy scares the crap out of me.

Bakura: Just continue playing Marik.

Marik: Ok Fluffy. *slenderman pops on the screen*

Marik and Bakura: Ahh!

Marik: *holds on to Bakura*

Bakura: *pushes him to the floor* Don't hug me again.

Marik: Fine Fluffy.

Bakura: I'm not a cat!

~Game Over~

Marik: I lose

_Hi guys this is chapter eleven, hope you like it_

_(1) I can't swear anymore sorry I got in trouble_

_Well I would like reviews please, and next chapter is Truth or Dare, so please give me truths or Dares for the Cast to do._

_BYE PEEPS!_


	13. Chapter 12

Twelve: Halloween

Marik: I can't wait for Halloween Odeon!

Odeon: how so master Marik?

Marik: I get to scare kids so they wet their pants.

Odeon: oh, well I have to go to my... Gummy bear collection. *leaves*

Marik: Ok, now to choose my scary costume. *looks through his closet*

Marik: nope. nada. hmm, nope. ah ha! *holds up a Twilight costume(Edward) 1*

Marik: when did I get this? *scratches his head*

Marik: Oh, no I don't remember, but I will scare kids with this! *puts on the costume*

Marik: I'm terrifying now Ha ha ha! *walks out the door*

**~Tristan's words of wisdom~**

**Tristan: *clapping* I have rabies yay**

**~That was Tristan's words of wisdom~**

Later that day...

Marik: I sparkle in the sun! *jumps in front of kids*

Kids: Ahhh! *runs away and drops their candy*

Marik: Candy! *grabs the candy and eats it*

At the house...

Melvin: *disguised himself as the wall out side*

kids: *come to the house* Trick or treat

Melvin: *jumps in front of them* Trick!

Kids: *scream, some wet their pants and run away*

Melvin: *laughs and grabs the candy and goes inside*

With Marik...

Marik: I don't feel so good. *walks back home*

Marik: *walks in his house and lays on the couch*

Melvin: *smirks and jumps in front of him* Boo.

Marik: *screams loudly and falls off the couch*

Melvin: *Laughs his head off* That was to easy.

Marik: That was not funny!

Melvin: it was. *leaves the room*

Marik: Hmp. no it wasn't. *sits on the couch*

_Hi, this was chapter 12, so give me reviews and that's all, Bye Peeps! _


End file.
